Two Years Later: The Astonishing Effects of Leaving Facebook and Instagram on My Personal Styling Business

As a personal stylist, my primary goal is to help every woman in my community have the knowledge and confidence to communicate her authentic personal style with pieces that flatter her frame and communicate her values. For over a decade, I’ve done this by offering up a framework for harnessing your unique personal style. Of course, an essential component to my work is illustrating my aesthetic. This is integral to growing my community and client base. After all, who wants to work with a stylist who doesn’t share your taste?

And what better way to share my point of view than with social media? In the first six years of my business (2013-2019), Facebook was a key component of my outreach efforts. I used it to grow my email list, promote blog posts and offer giveaways. I couldn’t believe how easy it was to market directly to my ideal client thanks to Facebook ads. I selected her gender, age, location and other brands she followed. Being a stylist based in Seattle, Nordstrom is the go-to for the majority of women here, so marketing directly to women who followed Nordstrom on Facebook was a no-brainer.

Truthfully, I only used the ads a few times because word of mouth was working well for me and, frankly, I felt a little uneasy about the whole process. Then I moved on.

When Instagram popped up, it was the ideal medium to highlight my activities, showcase local brands and boutiques and discover new makers. It was a lot more appealing to me than Facebook and by that point and I had cornered the market on #personalstylistSeattle without spending a dime.

But as the years went by, I became more and more concerned about the effects of social media on society. When the Cambridge Analytica scandal broke, I started to realize that the average person in my world had not considered the amount of data that Facebook was accumulating about them. My ability to perfectly target my ideal customer thanks to Facebook ads suddenly seemed a little shady. Certainly, targeted ads are a given but in light of Cambridge Analytica, things seemed different. I mean, of course an individual knew that following Nordstrom, sharing her age and favorite hobbies was public. Right? But had it ever occurred to her that this information would be shared with advertisers? I don’t know. Is it wrong? I don’t know that either. Targeted ads do make life easier. How awesome is it for the internet to shop for me without me having to do a thing? But what happens when information is shared when we don’t want it to be or with folks we’d rather not share it with?

I started marinating on all of this and was less and less enthusiastic about Facebook and Instagram. In the early years, my business was also on Twitter. Though I never really got into it, I typically shared the same content I was sharing on the other networks in an effort to get the business out there. It served me well when I was featured in a Microsoft Office ad campaign, a huge boon for my business. If I hadn’t been on Twitter, I would not have been featured.

But, when Donald Trump was elected president, I left Twitter.

I wasn’t a fan of the new normal of allowing our elected leaders to communicate in 140 characters rather than being held accountable in interviews or press conferences. To me, being on the platform signaled my support for the company’s approach and I felt complicit in it. So, I left.

I’ll stop here to say it had literally no impact on anyone that I left Twitter. I doubt anyone noticed. That being said, I knew that doing so meant that I might miss a future opportunity, like the Microsoft campaign, that was so beneficial to the business. At the time, I concluded that making that decision was worth the risk.

So as the years went on and Facebook’s behavior became more and more concerning to me, I already had experience leaving a platform. Sure, leaving Twitter wasn’t a huge shift like leaving Facebook and Instagram would be. But, it was something. And when my concerns started piling up, I knew leaving social media (except for LinkedIn and Pinterest, two sites that were not complicit in the way that Facebook and Instagram were) was becoming more inevitable.

Should I Wear a Belt?

As a personal stylist based in Seattle, I’ve spent over a decade deep in women’s closets. The initial tour of a new client’s belongings includes an overview of her pieces including and inevitable comment about belts. She either has a zillion of them in a drawer that she doesn’t wear or doesn’t have any. Regardless, a surprisingly high percentage of women feel that they lack some sort of expertise when it comes to styling a belt and that they are interested in my guidance on the topic.

With many things related to fashion and style, clients often feel that they didn’t get the memo and are ready to finally understand what to wear, when, why and most importantly how. That’s where I come in.

The Perfect Sheer Pieces for Your Body Type and Your Authentic Personal Style

As a personal stylist for women I am always on the hunt for new trends. Sure, there are shifts on runways that don’t translate to real life and yes, there are ready to wear movements that, while popular, aren’t super flattering. So, when we see trends that work on a runway and in real life, I’m all over it.

Sheer pieces are one of those trends. Considering wearing see through or semi-see through pieces tends to evoke a strong emotional response. You are likely either in the “no thank you” camp or in the “intrigued to yes, please world.” Most often, sheer pieces are one of those, “I’d love to if I can pull it off” trends. And my Dear Reader, I’m here to show you how you can absolutely pull it off.

Specifically, knowing which sheer options are right for your authentic personal style and your body type will give you the confidence to rock them on the regular. A few years back, I gave a friend a sheer grey long sleeve fitted top for her birthday. I’m guessing she was in her late forties then and she was surprised by the gift. Her initial response was gratitude and a clear message that she was unlikely to ever wear the item. But now, in her early fifties, she told me she was wearing the top for her birthday dinner. Few things have made me so happy.

The right sheer pieces can be timeless, age appropriate and still super sexy. (As an aside, if you’e been with me for some time, you likely know my stance on “age appropriate.” Essentially, just imagine you are living to 90 and be sure you aren’t wrapping up one phase too soon only to be left with the same four items for a good thirty years. Anyway, I digress.)

Don’t be afraid to embrace sheer pieces. Below is a collection of some of my favorites organized by body type. After all, if you know what flatters your shape, you are able to filter out all of the noise and start to build a sustainable, authentic collection that will be with you for years. Off we go!

Guest Post: Tips for Taking Top Shelf Selfies

As a personal stylist for women based in Seattle, I get an endless number of requests to write guest blog posts. Truly. So. Many. Requests.

I take our relationship very seriously, Dear Reader. You trust me with your time and my commitment is to give you quality content that helps you transform your authentic personal style and feel good about getting dressed everyday. I like to write those myself.

Simultaneously, I absolutely LOVE connecting you with other amazing folks. It’s great for you, great for them and frankly, makes my heart swell, too. You can find several of these guest posts in the In It Together Series that we launched in early lockdown.

One of my clients asked me for tips on taking a great selfie and I immediately knew who to ask. My friend and branding photographer, Suzanne Rothmeyer, generously agreed to share her tips and tricks and they exceeded my expectations. Let’s face it. We all need this skill. I expect you’ll be bookmarking this one- or pin it on Pinterest! Have fun with it and as always, let me know what you think. -Mellicia

5 Easy Ways to Transform Your Closet and Your Life Right Now

I don’t know about you, but I’m absolutely determined to have a great 2024. If not great, at least not awful and thanks to the election in November, I know the second option is very real. As a personal stylist for women, I see firsthand the impact that a fresh perspective can have on clients. For me, a space free of clutter with only pieces that are beautiful and functional has an extraordinary impact on my life. Really. And I bet you feel that way, too.

I also know that with the New Year comes new motivation and new expectations. We want to do it all: change our food habits, move more, volunteer and so on. Often by week two we discovered we were overly ambitious. With that in mind, this post isn’t how to do an exhaustive Closet Edit. Though trust me, I’m here for that! Instead, we’re focusing on five easy steps that will have a disproportionate effect on your life. Less effort and more payoff. Here we go!

Forget Panic Shopping: Get the Perfect Last-Minute Gift Now

An essential component of being a personal stylist is listening. It’s vital that I really see my client then we create a strategy to harness her authentic personal style using that information. Buying the perfect gift takes the same skill. It can feel intimidating, but it doesn’t need to. Really, it’s about paying attention to the recipient AND having a list of potential gifts so that you can match his/her/ their desires with something you can deliver.

As someone who takes a lot of pride in my gifting abilities, I can assure you that giving the right gift feels SO good for the both the recipient AND the giver. So, let’s give you some ideas, shall we?

10 Essential Tips to Keep You Dry without Sacrificing your Style in Rainy Weather

Welcome to yet another super rainy winter, Seattle-ites. As a personal stylist for women based in Seattle, I have over 20 years of experience getting dressed in the rainy city. A very high percentage of my personal styling clients are recent additions to the Pacific Northwest and although they are enthusiastic about the city, they tend to me flummoxed by the thought of getting dressed in anything but a North Face parka. That’s what I’m here for.

With another Atmospheric River upon us, it’s time for more guidance on dressing for the weather without sacrificing style. After all, fashion should be functional. Otherwise, those pretty things will hang in the closet while the sweats or jeans come out yet again. Fear not, Dear Reader, I’ve got you covered.

Shop Black Friday Sales for Your Hourglass Body Type

We’re finally here! This is the last installment of Black Friday Sales organized by body type. Our annual “Shop the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale by Personal Style Key Words” is so wildly popular, we decided to try something different this Black Friday.

We’re organizing Black Friday Deals by Body Type to simplify your life, streamline your shopping and bring a spark of joy to your week. Here’s what you need to know.

My Favorite Things Right Now

As a personal stylist for women based in Seattle, I spend a very high percentage of my time with women. One of the benefits of this lifestyle is the constant trading of resources. We’re always sharing books, shows, products and more with one another. Regularly referred to as, “Idea Girl” in my family, offering resources and solutions is one of my very favorite things to do. I also LOVE learning about new options. This personality trait brings us to one of my periodic blog post themes: My Favorite Things Right Now. Here we go!

How to Style a Silk Slip Dress for Fall

If you, like me, have become totally enamored with silk slip dresses, this is the blog post for you. Yes! They are everywhere. And Yes! They are feminine, functional and can be flattering. They can also be challenging to work with as the weather cools off. If you adore the idea of a silk slip dress but find that it doesn’t feel flattering on your frame or is a chore to style, we’ve got you covered.

Before we begin, All Saints has a stellar collection of “2 in 1s” or “two-fers.” Either name refers to a sweater that comes with a silk slip dress. They are beautiful and not inexpensive. This is one of my favorites. Enjoy a wide variety of prices and several styling options just for YOU. As always, I’d love to hear how it goes. Happy Fall, Dear Reader.

10 Brands, Retailers and Causes: Shop Your Values & Maximize the Impact Now

As a personal stylist for women and evangelist for all things that excite me, making the periodic lists of My Favorite Things is one of my great joys. This one, in particular, is focused on brands and retailers that are not only exciting for their visual design but also because of the values that each brand and/or retailer supports. Ideally, all of our purchases are aligned with our values. For some, those are a willingness to spend more in order to support up and coming designers or those who pay people a living wage. Others prefer sustainable brands that limit materials to biodegradable items, those that take up fewer resources or choices that reuse existing items. And for others, brands that align with her values may mean finding the best deal which leaves more of the budget for other items. My role is not to impart my values on anyone else.

Above all, I teach each of my personal styling clients to shop using clear filters: body type, personal style key words, color palette, lifestyle and when possible, values. So, keep those in mind when you dive into this list of my very favorite brands and retailers right now. I can’t wait to hear what you think!

I'm Petite. When Should I Buy Petite Clothing and When Should I Buy Standard Sizes and Have Pieces Tailored?

As a personal stylist for women everywhere, I’ve spent over a decade working with hundreds of women to harness their style. At a Poplin client event a few years ago, we took a group photo. It wasn’t until looking at the photo that I realized how many of my clients are petite. Of course, it makes sense. Finding pieces that fit your body is an essential component to feeling amazing in your clothing. And whenever retailers and brands make that process difficult, the result is often negative self talk and always frustration. This can happen thanks to the limited number of pieces available in certain size ranges- petite, tall, plus and especially petite plus.

Whether or not you are petite, defined in the US as 5’4” or below, you’ll find some real gems in this blog post. (As an added bonus, this post also features petite Poplin clients so you can dive into each woman’s style and see the magic of great fitting clothing and hear her perspective on working with Poplin.)

Before we begin, it’s helpful to truly understand the impact that having limited options has on a woman’s approach to personal style. Over the years, I’ve discovered that when a woman is limited to a small selection of pieces because of her size, she has often closed herself off to the idea of truly wearing what she wants. (This can also happen for women who don’t have access to desired retailers or brands because of their location or Trans women who are new to women’s clothing altogether.) Regardless of the reason, when a woman can’t even SEE the clothes she is interested in available to her, she an easily internalize that those styles aren’t for her. So, when I ask her to think aspirationally, if she could have any style without concerns about budget or lifestyle, she has no idea how to answer.

This is only one of the many reasons that fashion’s more inclusive approach to showing models of all body types and sizes is extraordinarily beneficial. Of course, there’s a long road ahead. But, we’re absolutely seeing progress.

Now, back to our original question: Should I buy petite clothing or buy standard sizes and have things tailored? The answer is: it depends or both, depending on who you are. Let’s dive in!

The 31 Best Boho Pieces at the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023

As a personal stylist for women, few events are as impactful as Nordstrom’s Anniversary Sale. Yes! Seattle is the home to Nordstrom HQ and that alone makes us love this sale. But, what truly sets anniversary apart from the others is that the sale consists of items for fall that are on sale first. When the sale is over, the prices increase. So, we have the opportunity to stock up on items that we’ll be wearing as the weather changes, rather than items that are from last season.

As a member of the Poplin community, you know that seeing something you like that is within your budget and available in your size is not reason enough to purchase it. The most important factor to determine whether or not you make a purchase is confirming that this piece communicates your authentic personal style and is available in a color that works for you. This color can bring you joy or be in your color palette. Ideally, it will do both.

Every woman has a unique authentic personal style and our goal is to help her harness that style and have the confidence to wear pieces that make her feel like the best version of herself. Anniversary is a great place to start that journey. The Poplin Pinterest Boards are another resource to get you there.

So this week, we’re combining the two. Each day we’ll share a blog post featuring my favorite items from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023 organized by style key words. You’ll see incredible finds in a range of price points and sizes for your Effortless, Minimalist, Edgy, Boho and Classic Style. So, get ready to shop and as always, let me know how it goes! Welcome to Day 5- Boho Style.

How to Shop for the Best 46 #EdgyPieces at the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023

Few events are as impactful as Nordstrom’s Anniversary Sale, at least when you are a personal stylist for women:) Yes! Seattle is the home to Nordstrom HQ and that alone makes us love this sale. But, what truly sets anniversary apart from the others is that the sale consists of items for fall that are on sale first. When the sale is over, the prices increase. So, we have the opportunity to stock up on items that we’ll be wearing as the weather changes, rather than items that are from last season.

As a member of the Poplin community, you know that seeing something you like that is within your budget and available in your size is not reason enough to purchase it. The most important factor to determine whether or not you make a purchase is confirming that this piece communicates your authentic personal style and is available in a color that works for you. This color can bring you joy or be in your color palette. Ideally, it will do both.

Every woman has a unique authentic personal style and our goal is to help her harness that style and have the confidence to wear pieces that make her feel like the best version of herself. Anniversary is a great place to start that journey. The Poplin Pinterest Boards are another resource to get you there.

So this week, we’re combining the two. Each day we’ll share a blog post featuring my favorite items from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023 organized by style key words. You’ll see incredible finds in a range of price points and sizes for your Effortless, Minimalist, Boho and Classic Style. So, get ready to shop and as always, let me know how it goes! Welcome to Day 4- Edgy Style.

My 27 Favorite Minimalist Pieces from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023

As a personal stylist for women, few events are as impactful as Nordstrom’s Anniversary Sale. Yes! Seattle is the home to Nordstrom HQ and that alone makes us love this sale. But, what truly sets anniversary apart from the others is that the sale consists of items for fall that are on sale first. When the sale is over, the prices increase. So, we have the opportunity to stock up on items that we’ll be wearing as the weather changes, rather than items that are from last season.

As a member of the Poplin community, you know that seeing something you like that is within your budget and available in your size is not reason enough to purchase it. The most important factor to determine whether or not you make a purchase is confirming that this piece communicates your authentic personal style and is available in a color that works for you. This color can bring you joy or be in your color palette. Ideally, it will do both.

Discover How to Communicate Your Classic Style with 75 Essential Pieces from the 2023 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale

As a personal stylist for women, few events are as impactful as Nordstrom’s Anniversary Sale. Yes! Seattle is the home to Nordstrom HQ and that alone makes us love this sale. But, what truly sets anniversary apart from the others is that the sale consists of items for fall that are on sale first. When the sale is over, the prices increase. So, we have the opportunity to stock up on items that we’ll be wearing as the weather changes, rather than items that are from last season.

As a member of the Poplin community, you know that seeing something you like that is within your budget and available in your size is not reason enough to purchase it. The most important factor to determine whether or not you make a purchase is confirming that this piece communicates your authentic personal style and is available in a color that works for you. This color can bring you joy or be in your color palette. Ideally, it will do both.

Every woman has a unique authentic personal style and our goal is to help her harness that style and have the confidence to wear pieces that make her feel like the best version of herself. Anniversary is a great place to start that journey. The Poplin Pinterest Boards are another resource to get you there.

So this week, we’re combining the two. Each day we’ll share a blog post featuring my favorite items from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023 organized by style key words. You’ll see incredible finds in a range of price points and sizes for your Effortless, Minimalist, Edgy, Boho and Classic Style. So, get ready to shop and as always, let me know how it goes! Welcome to Day 2- Classic Style.

The 30 Best Pieces to Communicate Your Effortless Style from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023

As a personal stylist for women, few events are as impactful as Nordstrom’s Anniversary Sale. Yes! Seattle is the home to Nordstrom HQ and that alone makes us love this sale. But, what truly sets anniversary apart from the others is that the sale consists of items for fall that are on sale first. When the sale is over, the prices increase. So, we have the opportunity to stock up on items that we’ll be wearing as the weather changes, rather than items that are from last season.

As a member of the Poplin community, you know that seeing something you like that is within your budget and available in your size is not reason enough to purchase it. The most important factor to determine whether or not you make a purchase is confirming that this piece communicates your authentic personal style and is available in a color that works for you. This color can bring you joy or be in your color palette. Ideally, it will do both.

Every woman has a unique authentic personal style and our goal is to help her harness that style and have the confidence to wear pieces that make her feel like the best version of herself. Anniversary is a great place to start that journey. The Poplin Pinterest Boards are another resource to get you there.

So this week, we’re combining the two. Each day we’ll share a blog post featuring my favorite items from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2023 organized by style key words. You’ll see incredible finds in a range of price points and sizes for your Effortless, Minimalist, Edgy, Boho and Classic Style. So, get ready to shop and as always, let me know how it goes!

Fashionable Sun Protective Clothing for Under $100

Summer is here and that means it’s time to stock up on sun protective clothing. The challenge is that so many options are functional but not fashionable. Not to worry. Your very own personal stylist is here to help. Take a look at an assortment of my favorites. Whether you are looking for extended sizes, various lengths or just something that feels fresh, there are options for you. Have a great time out there.

Not Loving Your Neck? Here's What to Do.

As a personal stylist for women, my conversations with clients go well beyond clothing. Naturally, we often discuss weight fluctuation, shifting identities and aging. Yes! There are a zillion clothing options for you to choose from and of course, flattering your frame has a major impact on how you feel. But the most important filter when choosing an item is whether or not it aligns with your authentic personal style. Does it fee like YOU? Does it feel like the YOU that you want to be, not the one that avoids risk of rejection or embarrassment. We’re talking about the you who wears that leather jacket or those wild shoes. Or perhaps this is the you that feels more comfortable in “menswear” or clothes that feel genderless. Whatever your innermost desire, that’s the you that the world deserves to see.

I’m in my late 40’s and am well aware of the changes in body, skin and hair that women my age are experiencing. Body acceptance is about loving your body where it is right now and finding beauty in it at every age and every size. This is absolutely achievable.

Body acceptance does not mean that you have to embrace changes that you don’t love. After all, we’ve got tools to address this. One of the most common concerns I hear from women over 45 is a sudden awareness of their necks. And not in a good way. When we’re younger, our necks aren’t really a thing and then one day… they are. So, if you’ve suddenly discovered your neck, here are some tips to help you love it again.

What is Adaptive Clothing and Where Can I Buy Cool Adaptive Clothing?

As a personal stylist for women, my role is to really see someone. I’m here to listen to observe and then to create a helpful strategy for her to harness her authentic personal style and simplify her life. This highly personalized process includes a deep dive into her values (would she prefer to support BIPOC makers, female founders, sustainable brands?), her mindset (is she struggling to accept her body as it is now or does she lack confidence in her stylistic choices?) and her lifestyle (what actually works for her day to day?).

I spend a great deal of time listening, researching and sharing my knowledge with individual clients and the Poplin community. Sometimes, information is directly applicable to you, the reader. Other times, it makes more sense for a friend or family member and is worth sharing. And then there are times when the information may not feel applicable, but knowing it changes you in some small way. I’m curious which of these camps you fall into.

Few things are as inspiring to me as watching a woman with power use her voice to make the world better. Sure, you can negotiate world peace in your efforts to improve the planet. But, for many of us, day to day choices have a significant impact on the people around us and the future direction of society. The women who have put their energy into offering truly inclusive clothing are making big changes in the industry and changing the conversation around inclusivity.

In the past few years, inclusivity sparks thinking about brands who offer sizes for every body type. Universal Standard was a front runner in this journey and our culture is forever changed thanks to that brand and other like it. No longer do “straight sizes” end at 14. Many retailers offer pieces up to size 18 or well beyond. That’s real progress.

Amplifying brands with female founders and/or founders of color is another big part of our journey to true inclusivity. Venture Capitalists who fund these brands have propelled them forward. We can also thank shows like Shark Tank that give opportunities to folks who may not otherwise have them and retailers like Nordstrom who started selling lesser known brands and introduced them to a huge consumer base.

Now, it’s time to take our conversation about inclusivity in fashion to another level. Let’s talk about Adaptive Clothing.